Till I disappear completely

Paulina Koeleman

The Large Glass Department

Mixed media installation 

Till I disappear completely is part of a research into belonging, being part of, unfolding the layers and finding what hides underneath them. What does it mean to be seen through a passport, name, symbols and appearance, where family history and sense of self are hidden until they disappear? The surface of documents hides and decides, takes over and erases knowledge, language, history and identity. Peeling the layers to find back what formed me, I can still uncover the traces of oppressive history that are part of my family’s struggle, being forcefully relocated during Stalin’s regime and still facing discrimination in the modern Russian state.